Bios - Iron Monkeys

Tool Flingers

Tabasco

Our Beloved Head Poo-Flinger, Tabasco Mills founded the Iron Monkeys in 2006 and remains our benevolent dictator. An artist blacksmith by trade, he enjoys ordering people around - it’s his shop and he says so - and particularly dislikes having to do the things he ordered other people to do. When he’s not in the shop, he’s just running a bit late and will be there shortly. Or, you know, he’s at Burning Man.

Karla

Possessed as she is of the amazing talent of finding awesome and useful-in-a-timely-fashion objects in the unlikeliest of places, many suspect Karla of receiving intel from the surrounding critters, a la St Francis of Assisi. Karla joined the Iron Monkeys in 2007 and has been banging and burning ever since. When not in the shop, Karla will be at work or school - except for that one time she found an endangered Northern White Rhino in Georgetown, and needed to take him to get a sweater.

Studley

An Iron Monkey since 2010 and a woodcarver since forever, Deanna Studley took to metalworking like a kraken to water. When not getting work done at the shop and filling tissues with a diabolical mixture of soot and snot, she’s working behind the scenes to help make sure all the non-shop work gets done, working on another one of her multiple art projects, or leading her double life as a stolen-art detective.

Flaster

When not reducing fundamentalists to tears over using the phrase "Intelligent Design," Flaster is over-thinking things, drinking, or choosing the slowest-moving supermarket cashier queue. An Iron Monkey since 2011, he likes learning new things in the shop, but once he had learned how to start scroll tips, he never wanted to do it again. He makes up for that by being a good sport about the Christmas lights and riveting with great enthusiasm.

Addie

Somehow being allowed to join this rowdy crew at the impressionable age of 16, Bacon has been a member of the Iron Monkeys since 2013. In the shop or on playa, she can be found being harassed by Tabasco or crawling under art fixtures with various types of wrenches. The rest of the year, she can be found at school or possibly at home (neither of which are even remotely close to Seattle), where she can be found studying for midterms/finals/labs or fixing bikes. She is also pretty much the best person ever and is super cool and smart and was most definitely not put in charge of writing bios for the website.

Darcy

A native of New York, Darcy joined the Monkeys in 2014. She's a big fan of hittin' stuff with other stuff, sometimes resulting in the process of making art, making her fit in quite well with the other member of the group. Outside of the Monkeys' grasp, she can be found saving lives and changing the world because she's A DOCTAH. In her spare time, she can be found smashing or riding her tall bike ridiculously gracefully.

The Blacksmith Shop

Owned by Monkey founding member Tabasco, The Blacksmith Shop is only sometimes the den of iniquity where Iron Monkeys forge both steel and friendships - the rest of the week it's home to the design and creation of Tabasco's blacksmithed art with function. The shop is part of Equinox Studios, home to many other artists who join the Monkeys and TBS for the monthly revelry of Georgetown's ArtWalk.

Kay

Armed with her whip-cracking snark and the Power of COMMUNITY!, Kay Morrison joined the Iron Monkeys in 2007 after being inordinately impressed by Tabasco’s masterful hammer-swinging. A practiced forger (when we can tear her away from her seventeen regional committees, or that really important part in Diablo) Kay gets a kick out of teaching newbies how to taper - when she’s not in the shop’s de facto karaoke lounge.

The Russian

The Russian joined the Iron Monkeys in 2009 and has been awesome, creepy, but awesome ever since. When not bolt-tasting or trimming their hair on the belt sander, The Russian hammers tapers second only to Tabasco’s in their symmetry and consistency, and applies superior determination, persistence and cleanliness to any given order. When not in the shop, The Russian is either “busy”, or “working”, and “certainly not spying” while having really great hair. Like, really great.

Dave

Way back in 2012, Dave Rosen joined the Iron Monkeys for an unknown reason. To this day, he can be found welding-slash-dancing in the shop, (which is something we do not recommend to the untrained). He quite often attempts to baffle other Monkeys by somehow knowing what he doesn't know, in the sense that he really does know. When not in the shop, he will probably be off using time-share points before they expire with his lovely wife, Steph.

Steph

Stephanie Rosen is a world-class acolyte-screener, coming to the Iron Monkeys in 2013 for this specific purpose and to fulfill her dreams of screening acolytes forever. In the shop, she can be found making chain or using the weird magnetic stick-thing to clean up little pieces of metal. She is known for her mesmerizing, soul-piercing stare, which she probably learned from being a teacher. In her time off, she may be found grading papers, hanging out with Dave, grading papers, or grading papers.

Rich

Coming to us from across the pond, Rich has been the resident Brit of the Iron Monkeys since 2014. When in the shop, he can be known to use the power of English Breakfast and standing in queues to make playa staplers and attach wire mesh to just about anything. He usually is not in the shop, though, due to fact that he enjoys creating sandworms and lives approximately 4,781 miles away. (That's bloody well 7,694.274 km for you metric-users!)

Lea

Since good ol' 2015, Lea has been a member of the Monkeys. She brings in ridiculous amounts of adorableness (see photo) and expertise in welding and electrical stuff and dealing with Flaster. She may look cute, but she's also pretty much kind of a badass. When Lea's not in the shop, she can be fancied a photographer and a master of many secret but easily assumed awesome things.